Following Stansted I had found out that to be able to give healing I needed to obtain a qualification, which is over a 2 year period involving study time. I decided that my job is too stressful to enable me to take this on fully, so I will have to find something else. At the beginning of the year, I was successful in getting a new job. I am due to start the new job in April so I joined the local Spiritualist church where they run healing training, shortly afterwards. So I start my 2 year training in May and I'm really excited.
I am still in touch with one of the ladies I met at Stansted and often meet up with her to go to Mind, Body, Spirit exhibitions etc. Keeping in touch with Rita is good for me as I don’t have too many people to talk about the spooky way of life. Rita is in a circle and is a good medium.
During one of our conversations, Rita said that she was really feeling that she was not progressing in her circle and is considering giving it all up but she would like to go on another seminar to she still feels at the end of it. Rita asked if I would like to go with her and I as I didn't want her to give up I agreed to go. I wasn’t sure if it was what I wanted as I don’t have any mediumistic gifts but I would go with her to give her a bit of support and I could do with another break. We agreed to have a search around for somewhere.
I’ve seen a place called Hafan-y-Coed in Wales on the internet that runs all sorts of courses. It is in the Breacon Beacons, looks really nice and the cost was very reasonable. I gave Rita the web address for her to have a look at. After a day or two Rita called to say that it looks very good and there is a week’s course she would like to do with a guy called Tony Stockwell, what did I think? I have never heard of him I said. He is doing a psychic programme on Living TV said Rita, haven’t I seen it? No I hadn’t but I did watch the programme and thought he seemed OK but I will go with what she decides as this week was mainly for her and not me.
We arrived mid afternoon, the setting really peaceful with some great views ( when the sun shone). There wasn’t much else around there, Abercraf is only a small village but there was a pub just up the hill that seemed more like a mountain when you walked up it !! We booked in and got ourselves sorted out, had our dinner and then sat in the main hall to wait for Tony Stockwell to arrive. There were about 22 people in the group.
The couple that run the centre said they had received a message from Tony Stockwell to say he was running late, so they devised a little exercise for us all to get to know each other, which was basically forming a line of two chairs and telling the person opposite as much as you can about yourself in 5 mins, when we were then moved along to the next chair, great way of meeting your fellow inmates I'd say. The last lady I spoke to I found out lives in the same town as Mum, she knew the street where Mum lived. Small world indeed I thought.
Tony Stockwell arrived quite late in the afternoon, gave a short introduction and I thought he seems like a sweet guy. He then told us what he wanted us to do for the first exercise and asked if we were clear what he wanted, which was to extend our own auras around the other person and give a message from someone in spirit to whoever we were partnered up with.
WHAT?!?! I had NEVER done anything like THAT in my life, that's what Rita does not me, what is he talking about? He must be mad, I was only there to keep Rita company and to have a break, not to do this sort of thing. So when he asked us if we understood what it was we were to do my hand shot up and said ‘I understand want you want but I can't do that’. He replied with ‘You know more than you are letting on’ (I have never found out what he meant by that). I just gave Rita a confused look and thought well, he will find out soon that I can't do what he is asking anyway then I would have the rest of the week free to myself and relax a bit.
We were paired off and I was with Lynn, who was giving demonstrations at her local church she told me. 'Well I can't even do this so don't expect a lot from me sweetheart' I told her, I closed my eyes and did what Tony said to do about extending my aura, not even knowing how to do such a thing and I couldn't believe it but I could see an elderly lady, a bit faint at first, but I could see her standing by a wee table out in the garden. She was smiling and looking very serene, I could see her !! Excited now, I told Lynn what I was seeing and she asked me to described her, which I proceeded to do as best I could, her hair colour and the dress she was wearing but Lynn said that she thought she knew the lady but wasn't sure. I was a bit disappointed as I thought it was a good description of this nice lady, but Lynn wasn't sure who she was. Now I thought that maybe she wasn't there afterall and I had made her up in my mind as I knew that I couldn't do this anyway !
By now, it was evening time so we finished for the day. Tony and the lady from Mum's home town I'd met earlier went off to get some wine (there is not a bar in this place) and we had a relaxing evening just chatting. Think I has a bit too much to drink though.
The next day, the sun was shining so Tony said we should work outside as it was so nice. So we took our chairs and sat on the green, he then told us were to 'feel' what had been in this place before. We all paired off again and went off in different directions around the grounds, me and Rita were drawn to a tree and we both made our way over to it. When we started to 'feel' the energy of that tree, I felt very sick and breathless, I couldn't get my breath and felt like my throat was constricting. Rita said she could see a young man crouching down looking very frightened. She could see I was having difficultly breathing so we moved away from there and those feelings went away.
When we all got back together to report back what we had 'felt'. There is nothing I hate more than standing up and speaking in front of people but he made me do just that, grrrrr, anyway I told what we had felt by that tree and, as it turns out, a young man was hung for stealing, back in the days when they did that sort of thing.
During the rest of the week, we did all kinds of exercises some psychic and some mediumistic, some I did well at and not so well at others. Sadly, I can't remember a lot of them now which is why this entry is a bit short. I do remember we did some table tipping which was totally amazing I thought, trance dance (interesting), a sort of ghost hunt and watched as a couple of other students did trance. The most marvellous thing was to see Tony doing Trance, absolutely blew me away and was in trance myself watching his face change and listening to the words from his guides own voice. How fantastic is that I thought, some people were in tears, very moving indeed.
On our last day, we were split into pairs again. I was paired up with the lady from my Mum's home town and we were to give each other a message from spirit. I was given a message from my Nan which was of a very personal nature and brought up an issue that I had thought I had long since buried. I was a bit stunned as Nan didn't even know about it as I hadn't told any of my family. Obviously Nan thought it needed to be raised again as I hadn't dealt with it, I had just blocked out of my mind if I am honest and left it in my more unpleasant memory bank as for some reason I felt guilty about what had happended to me.
It wasn't until Spring of 2005 that I was able to rid myself of the guilt I had been holding on to for almost 30 years although it was not my guilt to have in the first place, it was someone else that deserved to carry that burden, not me. It was upsetting for for me that this to be brought up again but, after more than a few tears, hugs and words of encouragement, I did manage to calm myself sufficiently and I was able to give a message to the lady from one on her relatives which she could accept so I was pleased with that in the end.
We came back together in the main hall to feedback on what was given and received by the pairings then Tony went on to give the most wonderful talk/lecture I have ever heard, even to this day. It was so obvious that it came from straight from his heart and was so inspiring and beautiful that it brought tears to my eyes. I thought, I just love this guy for the beautiful way he inspires people, what a wonderful gifted person this man is. It is so obvious that he just loves the work he does for spirit, a truly remarkable human being.
Tony left a day early due to other commitments but left a message with the organiser to say to I was to be among those giving clairvoyant messages during the last nights service. WHAT !!!! There was no way I could do that, not only because I didn't feel my abilities were that good but because of the message I had been given earlier from my Nan which had I had found very upsetting due to it's content. It was wonderful that Tony felt that I could do this and I am very grateful for the faith he had in me but wasn't in a fit state emotionally to even attempt it. So I had to tell the lady, sorry, but I couldn't to it. I felt that I had let Tony down but I had no choice I believe.
The whole week was a complete wonder to me, not only did I find out that I do have mediumistic qualities, albeit it very little I considered, but I had the privilege to meet this truly wonderful person who I really don't think realises just how much of an inspiration is he to others. If I can harness just a tiny bit of what he is then I would be a very happy person indeed. This week certainly changed my life and I realised that I was now hooked on this gentle, beautiful, awesome and at at times mind blowing way of life and I never want to leave it, ever.
I then decided that if I only ever do healing and not develop mediumistically I couldn't ask for anything else. I realise that it is a blessing to be given the gift of spiritual healing and I am very grateful for it. I have no idea what spirit have in store for me for the furture, only time will tell but I feel it is an exciting future whatever it may hold for me.